World So Cold
by fighterkirby1998
Summary: His story is frigid. His story is bitter. His story is cold. His story was lost in the triumph of the victors, but here it is again. Snape/Lily oneshot.


I.

He hardly ever showed his true face.

Compassion and sympathy were foreign to him. That's what they all thought, at least, and maybe in a way it was true. Indeed, Severus Snape had never been known as a kind man. Even to himself, he knew his name as a symbol of hatred for many.

His childhood had not been easy.

Born as a half-blood, the fateful day when he met her seemed to be the birth of a freshly paved road to the future, but along with it, came the fires of hell. The day his path crossed with Lily Evans's became the day true hatred flared in his heart, when the shadows of malicious wills finally caught up to him, silent and fostering quietly within.

So quietly, he hadn't realized his real nature until it was too late.

II.

_"Gryffindor!"_

Even years later, the sound of applause, the strain of his veins, the pulsing of his blood, hadn't quite faded from his mind. He watched her take the ridiculed hat off her head, turn, give him a small, sad smile, and disappear among the throng of her kind.

_"Slytherin!"_

These two words, so different, yet so alike. In his mind, he only knew that there now existed a crevice between them. One impossible to cross.

And yet, he was determined to cross it.

III.

_"Snivellus."_

That word started it all. The moment he and Lily had met James Potter, the world had ended.

"Leave him alone!"

There's that voice. The silver lining. He watched her, blazing green eyes, full of passion and ambition. _Why aren't you... a Slytherin?_ But it's too late. The crevice is undoable.

_She hasn't changed at all,_ he thought quietly to himself.

"Mudblood."

A flicker of surprise on her face. Had the world not ended a long time ago, it had now.

III.

_Even if I had to go around the whole Earth to reach you... I would've._

The newlywed looked up at him, smiling, unaware of his identity, his pain, his heart. James Potter had stolen everything.

"You must forgive," Dumbledore said quietly.

"That again?" he muttered angrily. "You have no idea... how much she meant to me...!"

"Of course I do," the old wizard whispered. "Severus, there is a time for everything. Hatred... doesn't belong now."

"And I suppose forgiving and forgetting does?"

"I never said anything about forgetting." Dumbledore stood up, strode around his desk, and approached the seat where Snape sat. "You do not learn from your mistakes if you forget. You let go of memories you cherish. You have had... good times with her, haven't you?"

"Yes."

"Would you rather cling onto all those memories, the good and the bad, or forget her completely? Severus, Lily Evans is a big part of your childhood. To erase her... what kind of a man would you be?"

"Her name... is Lily Potter," he said stiffly, through gritted teeth.

Dumbledore's eyes twinkled. "Ah, Severus, the wonders of first love. Tell me, do you love her enough to keep her as part of your heart?"

Snape said nothing, and only sat in silence.

IV.

He had crossed the crevice through the other side of the world, but she was not there waiting for him.

He crouched there over her body, but the wondrous life she was once so full of was gone.

He sat there and wept, but at the same time, answered Dumbledore's question silently within himself.

He had finally accepted himself for who he was. He knew why he was outcasted.

But it didn't mean he was ready to forgive.

V.

He was resolved to give the boy hell.

When he finally reached his eleventh year and arrived at school, every eye was on him. Snape watched from the top of the Great Hall, watched the boy put on the same hat that had condemned him to his fate. Watched the back of his head, the same messy hair as his father... and for a moment, he wanted to strike.

_"Gryffindor!"_

It's the same voice. The same hat. Only in an entirely different world when the crevice was ever deeper than before.

Harry Potter turned around and looked at him with Lily's eyes.

* * *

**A.N.: **This story isn't special, it isn't unique, it isn't different in many ways. But Snape's tale has always touched my heart and I dug this out of an ancient WIP folder a few minutes ago. Here it is.


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